029: What is your personal brand identity?

Howdy folks,

I've been thinking a lot about identity over the past week - I'm not sure why exactly. Maybe it was going to a Chinese restaurant or a documentary that I watched on Sunday but it really got my brain ticking. So let's just get into shall we?

What the hell is this identity thing anyway?

I don’t have a master's degree in this but I’ve been challenged with identity my entire life and I feel like I’ve found my answer which I’d like to share in the hope that you might find some clarity, truth or just find the identity question mildly interesting.

I feel like identity is a highly emotionally triggering word in today's world. So anything I share is from my own personal experience and has nothing to do with judging anyone else’s identity.

Let's get things straight

I’ve got friends from all economic backgrounds, countries, ages, genders, and religious backgrounds. If you’ve ever met me in person you’d probably come away with the feeling that I’m just a pretty friendly dude no matter who you are. I try to treat everyone like we’re all great equals on this shared planet.

This isn’t trying to toot my own horn. Being friendly with people probably comes from fact that I’ve always felt like such an outsider that I want everyone I meet to feel welcomed, accepted - loved even?

Without writing a biography I’d like to share a few things that are a bit weird about me, which might explain my confusing relationship with identity.

Matt's Identity Confusion

• Mixed race Irish mum - Chinese dad
• Born in Ireland which is mostly white don't fit in - but don’t speak any Chinese
• Don’t live in Ireland - live in multiple countries as a digital nomad
• I'm spiritual - but not religious
• I meditate - but not woo-woo
• I do ‘online business - but I am lifestyle focused not money focused
• I don’t have a work calling - I do random projects that I love
• Diagnosed dyslexic - who writes daily
• 1000+ Duolingo steak - but can only say a few words
• music tastes go from chilled jazz - to hard rave or metal
• I’m ‘lazy’ - but I like to work everyday
• I suck at selling - but I’ve sold over 100k things worldwide
• I look like an extrovert - but I’m introverted
• Look like a ‘bro’ - but I’m a massive nerd
• Might look like have it figured out - have no idea and just learning as I go along
• Might look confident - struggle with fear & anxiety regularly

I could go on but I hope you get the picture.

It’s been confusing, but it’s gotten less confusing lately.

I think what I’ve realised is that I’ve just spent so much time trying to identify myself - trying to fit into a label.

Looking at others for inspiration or groups to find that ‘tribe’. But every time I’ve gone down these paths the more I realised that I just didn’t fit there.

1. ☘️ I don’t look Irish no matter if I wear an Ireland shirt.
2. 🐲I don’t look Chinese even if I try to speak the language.
3. 🎨 If I build a business just because I see it as an opportunity I know that down the line I will avoid it as it ‘doesn’t feel right’

But this isn’t a pity party.

This is a celebration, a liberation and I hope you can feel and see that.

Because what I’ve realised is that identity for me. It isn’t about labelling myself in some way.

It’s about feeling comfortable being in a category of 1.

All the things that I was scared and ashamed of growing up in life. They aren’t good or bad. It’s just how it is. And the more I accept this the better my life feels.

Ever. Single. Time.

1. Instead of writing ‘the right way’ I write my own weird way.
2. Instead of feeling a lack of cultural identity I embrace all the cultures where I go and live
3. Instead of feeling non-Irish but not really Chinese either. I embrace both sides. I love potatoe bread and dim sum. (See image ❤️)

And with work. It probably looks weird. I don’t have a ‘thing’ I’m an architect, designer, marketer.

I do a bunch of different things because that’s what I love to do. It gives me energy, joy, enthusiasm and drive.

It’s not for everyone.

And that’s totally cool - this is just for me.

And maybe my weirdness of not being able to identify with labels. Gives me a unique position to bridge gaps between cultures, people and identities.

1. I can chat to gym bros and fellow gaming nerds.
2. I have space to listen to people’s different religions and beliefs.

This didn’t come from me having a strong identity. It came from my lifelong journey of being lost with it.

But here’s my hope for you.

If you’re anything like me and feel like you don’t fit into a box nice and neatly.

I hear you, see you and feel you.

But if like to invite you to come to the club

It’s a club that only has space for 1

It’s Club {your name} , Club {🍕 Joey Tribbiani}, Club {👜 Rachel Green}

And from the bottom of my heart, I hope you freaking love partying in your club

But that's all for this week thanks for checking in and I hope there were some ideas in there which was interesting for you!

But that's it for this week - here’s wishing you a badass week ahead.

Stay awesome

Matt

🫶

P.s

I know from experience it can feel scary, lonely and you might question would it not be easier to squeeze yourself into another club.

But if there’s anything I’ve learned over the years it's, that the real party in life is in your own private club.

It comes from you being unapologetically you and you identify with that 100%. For me,its lonely that’s having an identity beyond the labels.

🔥 Dope stuff from this week

1. Ghost CMS as an educational platform

I have been on the lookout for the best way I can build out my vision for Start Designing Life. I've been down my usual rabbit holes looking for the 'best' solution to what I want to do.

The software that came closest was Nas.io, Circle & Skool. I signed up tested, was comparing features, prices etc. What came out top?Well, like most things in life, each has its own unique use case but none really quite fit for what I wanted to do.

So in the end I decided that I should not compromise and try and do it the way I envision it.

I've decided I'll use Ghost CMS for the site, educational resources and paid memberships and will use Beehiiv for the newsletter. It's probably too much to go into full details of my dream for Start Designing Life but I did a bit of a walkthrough in this week's live session.

But I'm so excited to put this together and I'll be sharing more about it whenever I get closer to releasing something that is useful for people - so stay tuned

2. The War on Children

Can we all agree that things are a bit mad? Stumbled across this documentary and Vaidile & I watched it yesterday. Every 10min we would have to hit pause and do a little chat about what was just said.

I'm not saying that I agree with everything in there but this documentary starts to piece together some of the questions I think we're all wondering. How did we get here? What's going to happen to the kids today growing up with social media etc.

📚 The Book Club

Here's what I've been reading or listening to lately alongside some little nuggets I've picked up through the week.

📖 Mastery: Robert Greene

• Do you know that feeling when you find a book that just really hits the spot? Well, that's this book for me. I've listened to this for hours over the weekend and was loving every minute.
• I'm not one for remembering quotes easily but what I'm getting from this book is along the line of your life's work or calling. Sounds cheesy why I say it - but it's not like this in the book. It's been absolute gold for me and where I'm at right now. If you're feeling a calling for a piece of work or a new career path it might just give the boost, hope and inspiration.

📖 Fingerprints of the Gods by Graham Hancock

• Every night I listen to like 30min of this book then I fall asleep and remember like 10 min of it. But I love the stories of ancient Egypt - it's like an adult bedtime story but it's based on real events - so cool.

🎵 Music I'm Loving

Adding in a new section to the newsletter. I love music. I love listening, playing guitar, I love finding new music, I love all types of genres (apart from country sorry). I want to share a cool song I've found and I'll be putting together curated Spotify playlists that fit for all moods.

🧊 Super Chill

🔋 ENERGY

From chill to hype. I've put together this ENERGY playlist last week. It's there to get you pumped, moving, jumping, dancing.

Grab a cup of coffee, put this playlist on and watch that productivity flow.

Get started by listening to Get Down by Sol State - it's music created by my friend Ross who I met in Bali. Bringing that Bali beach rave right to your ears.

and that is it for this week's newsletter folks

wishing you a great week ahead as always

let's chat soon

Matt

🫶

Stay awesome ❤️

P.s

Did you enjoy the newly added music section? Feel free to send me over some songs you're enjoying at the moment. I absolutely love finding new music. Jazz, Dance, Rock, Electro, Funk - just no country music (even if it's Beyonce's new album 🤠)